I’m About To Get All SOC Up In This Bitch.

Recently I’ve realized that I only post anything when I’m feeling all mopey and thought, “How fucking obnoxious are you?“

Also I entertain myself in all kinds of retarded ways, and if you’re lucky enough not to be on my AIM friends list, you are spared most of my ramblings.* Once I apparently stunned a friend into silence;  He said he didn’t know what to say, as he forgets sometimes that I tend to go all Stream Of Consciousness on him, or SOC.  Which made me laugh a big, deep throated, hearty, amused laugh.  The kind that comes totally unexpected and from the guts.  Those are my favorite.
*Although I did once go off on a porn rant about how Mystery Science Theater 3000 ruined my ability to enjoy porn without making fun of it. Also there was some botched boob job observations. I wish I had saved that AIM conversation.

WHAT WERE YOU SAYING AGAIN?
Also I had someone ask me a question, and I remember having the same conversation at least two other times with this particular person.  It’s alright, I don’t mind,* but it does cause my overactive imagination to create scenarios of our last two conversations with the same subject.  Sort of me just rambling on and on and the other person on the other end of the phone line saying, “uh huh. Yeah.”  And other interactive-y type comments, while their thoughts slowly start to drift toward some weird subject like Dukes of Hazard or maybe how awesome french toast is or something.
*You make a few jokes four years ago about how your short term memory is shot (wink, wink! nudge, nudge! drug references!  Oh, how clever!  Surely I am original!  Right?  Right?  Wait!  Where are you going?) and suddenly you lose every argument by default because apparently you can’t remember shit, so why are you even bothering to argue?  /grumble

NOW WITH 20% MORE KIM!

Something else I tend to do, and have for as long as I can remember, is self-censor to the point of bland blah-ness.  Random weird thoughts I just, you know, don’t share.  Kind of a reduce-the-blank-stare-nod-and-smile reaction.  So I tone it down.

HOWEVER! I! am! tired! I am boring myself to tears.
With very few people I don’t really do that,some people I just kind of let them see all of me, which is  incredibly weird and scary but also kind of nice too.  One of them told me last week that they didn’t have enough ram to cover my estrogen, which induced a “HA HA! Oh man!  I will totally punch you in the arm for that one!”  Funny at first but then kind of left a sting.  Oh well.

THERE’S A POINT HERE, I PROMISE.

You, gentle readers, have the option of just closing the window.  You have the option of skimming.  When I start rambling about my opinion on Radiohead* in great detail, you can skip over that part or maybe go grab yourself a cup of coffee and come back when I’m done.  Although if you want to, feel free to read the whole darn thing, comment, send me mail, whatever.
*Oh, Radiohead, I love you so!  Last night 15 Step came on my shuffle, and I rocked out in the kitchen with a broom as an impromptu microphone.  What I learned?  I do not have Thom Yorke’s stage presence.  Maybe if I practice, though, I can get my own band and then do interviews and get all pissy when they ask me about my band.  (Thom, I love you to bits.  But come on.  <3)

I don’t know how often I’ll update this, or how much I’ll actually have to say.  Usually there’s a near-constant narrative of Shit In My Head That Makes Me Laugh and I think, “I should write that down.”  So I figure…I will.  Why the hell not?  And if nobody reads this, that’s cool.  I can record crap for posterity .. or .. something.  Also, I get to be All The Random Shit In My Head Whether You Like It Or Not and I don’t have to worry about you thinking I’m weird.  Because apparently you all think I’m weird already, so I might as well go for the gold and all that jazz.  At least that way I won’t feel like I’m choking on my words, or wearing some godawful whalebone corset, insert other lame ass comparisons here.

Sad confession: I abuse my bookmarks.  I always bookmark a page thinking, “I don’t have time to read that now, I’m doing THIS right now, so I’ll come back.”  Usually I never do, and the result is a mile and a half long list of bookmarks that are wild and unmanaged and feral,  just running around in the streets and fighting with each other.
If I can’t think of any amusing thing to write, I can just link a bookmark for your amusement, and then maybe I’ll read said link and delete the fucker.
Here’s hoping.

MMM MMM GOOD!
Lately I’ve been craving fruits and vegetables and other not-so-much-meat things.*  Tonight I really wanted soup, but all the soupyness that was in the pantry was chicken soup and miso soup.  I really like miso soup, but for some reason the last few times I’ve had it, it just hasn’t been All That Great™.  Or for Jan, “This miso soup is sub par.”
*Little known fact: When I was old enough that I wasn’t forced to eat certain things, (although I argued constantly with my mother when I was little because she’d force me to eat my chicken or whatever other meat like thing was for dinner, and all I wanted to do was eat my vegetables.)  I tried to eat mostly vegetarian.  It wasn’t so much a political OMG THOSE THINGS USED TO BE ALIVE BOO HOO thing, I just enjoy fruits and vegetables more and prefer them over meat. Eventually I gave up because of laziness and convenience.  Also sometimes you just really crave a really good steak.

And really, how does, “Soybean Paste Soup with Tofu” not sound appetizing?  Yeah.  I thought so.

Back in my young, perky, nubile, (oh my!) vegetarian days,  one thing I really loved was Lawry’s Seasoned Salt because I could steam the shit out of some vegetables, sprinkle some of that on top and my taste buds would writhe in delight.  mmm.

THE POINT!  (There is one, I promise.  I think.)
I threw some seasoned salt in my miso soup along with some  vegetables, and it was greatly improved.  Hooray!  “But Kim!” you might say, “Doesn’t that sort of defeat the purpose?  It’s not Miso soup anymore so much as some weird concoction soybean paste soup with tofu AND vegetables AND spices!  Sort of like some orphaned weird Gumbo!”  To which I say: Shhhh!

Also? Orphaned Gumbo? Band name.

That seems like kind of a lame ass place to leave this thing, but it’s late and I HAVE TO PEE.

See?  I’m already over sharing.  THIS IS GOING TO BE GREAT!